I have a mere week and a few days left of Summer Vacation. I still have to finish my freaking Math Packet...
I get the concept of it, but then what's the point of the whole month of review that we do when we start class?
I also have to finish reading The Book Thief, which is fantastic.
But I have two other books I got from the library like a month ago..... They're sending me emails saying how much I owe them in late fees. It's a problem.
Sixteen Candles and Monty Python and The Holy Grail are two of the funniest things I've watched all summer.
I'm spending my slowly dwindling days of freedom blogging, watching JennaMarbles, and listening to Whitney Houston.
I honestly don't think I'm ready for high school. It's the whole getting lost thing. All the other middle schools in our district have at least two floors and are twice as big and have each been redone completely at least three times, but not ours. Nope. One floor and puny. The town wouldn't even give them enough money to repair all the things that are broken like heating and windows and not removing asbestos and that stuff. They say they need more classrooms because they have teachers sharing rooms and traveling by cart, which is bull because there aren't more than 20 kids in each class. Just combine a few classes and lay off a teacher or two, maybe the ones who didn't teach Math but instead showed students YouTube videos all day (True Story and the reason I can't do the math packet without help from Panseh, because she went to a math camp.)
I like writing and blogging and YouTube, and I was thinking it would be a good idea to get my own laptop for high school. Everyone complains about how long I'm on the computer, doing schoolwork and such.
So I'm searching the Apple website because we are strictly a Mac household. This is what happened.
MacBook Air Page is all like, "You want a basic 11 inch MacBook with no extra memory or attachments besides the charger and built in applications? Mmmmm 'kay. That'll be a thousand dollars."
So I'm all like, "C'mon Mac! I'm choosing you over PC! Couldn't ya offer me something a little less expensive?"
And it's all like, "Well I can give you the same thing just preowned! That'll still be about nine hundred bucks."
And so my brain goes, "ERROR. ERROR. DOES NOT COMPUTE."
My God! I am going into ninth grade and the only job I have is doing laundry. And I don't even get paid for that.
My dad works for a state university, so that somehow gives him a student discount on Apple Products, but that's still a metric butt ton of money.
Anyone wanna donate?
Showing posts with label wtf. Show all posts
Showing posts with label wtf. Show all posts
Friday, August 17, 2012
Saturday, May 26, 2012
The Doctor Dances?
Sooooo fellow internet trolls........ Today we threw my mom a surprise party for her milestone birthday!
It all went swimmingly, in the time it took her to watch my brother's baseball game we set up the entire back yard and got 50 people over. She had no idea, and it was hysterical. Earlier this morning, she was grumbling about how my dad had a day off and didn't get anything done. I almost peed myself laughing, because on his day off we were driving back and forth across town getting things like tiki torches.
I turned Pandora on, I was dancing like a flower child in my maxidress. Oh, one her friend's daughter told me I looked like Taylor Swift!
I had a sudden urge to do the drunken giraffe dance. Observe.
I did that for the end of the song that was playing. Then the next song that came on was "Crazy Little Thing Called Love".
That's the song that the Doctor dances to in the video up above.
Coincidence?
"Never ignore a coincidence. Unless you're busy."
~ The Doctor in 'The Pandorica Opens'
It all went swimmingly, in the time it took her to watch my brother's baseball game we set up the entire back yard and got 50 people over. She had no idea, and it was hysterical. Earlier this morning, she was grumbling about how my dad had a day off and didn't get anything done. I almost peed myself laughing, because on his day off we were driving back and forth across town getting things like tiki torches.
I turned Pandora on, I was dancing like a flower child in my maxidress. Oh, one her friend's daughter told me I looked like Taylor Swift!
I had a sudden urge to do the drunken giraffe dance. Observe.
That's the song that the Doctor dances to in the video up above.
Coincidence?
"Never ignore a coincidence. Unless you're busy."
~ The Doctor in 'The Pandorica Opens'
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
I'm Not Dead!
I'm not dead! I was only absent from school for three days with a virus.
So the virus going around right now is fever, sore throat around the vocal chords, headache, and stomachache. My little brother was home with it last week and I was the lucky one who got it next!
The thing that was different about my illness is that my sore throat wasn't in that area. My doctor said it might be strep. But good news! I don't need to get swabbed for strep because I'm already on antibiotics. Because I woke up at 4:15 a.m. yesterday with a raging double ear infection.
Your ears are supposed to be full of air, not fluid.
This is seriously screwing with my balance, I am dizzy as hell.
In other news, youtube!
I have a youtube channel. Yeah.
Here's a link: http://www.youtube.com/user/egirl998
Yup.
So the virus going around right now is fever, sore throat around the vocal chords, headache, and stomachache. My little brother was home with it last week and I was the lucky one who got it next!
The thing that was different about my illness is that my sore throat wasn't in that area. My doctor said it might be strep. But good news! I don't need to get swabbed for strep because I'm already on antibiotics. Because I woke up at 4:15 a.m. yesterday with a raging double ear infection.
Your ears are supposed to be full of air, not fluid.
This is seriously screwing with my balance, I am dizzy as hell.
In other news, youtube!
I have a youtube channel. Yeah.
Here's a link: http://www.youtube.com/user/egirl998
Yup.
Friday, May 4, 2012
Happy Birthday Mom.....
My dear mother's birthday was on May 1st. Most people remember that date as MayDay, but I never have.
The way I remember it is Maypril Fool's Day.
Shut up.
For her birthday, she got possibly strep and pink eye.
JUST KIDDING. It was more like irritated, irate red eye. Her eye was swollen shut and her tears came out thick, brown, and yellow.
Her entire cornea was bright red.
It's still kinda orange now, but it's better.....
We're planning a surprise party for her, but I gotta say that is a pretty shitty way to spend a birthday.
So......
I LOVE YOU MOMMY!
The way I remember it is Maypril Fool's Day.
Shut up.
For her birthday, she got possibly strep and pink eye.
JUST KIDDING. It was more like irritated, irate red eye. Her eye was swollen shut and her tears came out thick, brown, and yellow.
Her entire cornea was bright red.
It's still kinda orange now, but it's better.....
We're planning a surprise party for her, but I gotta say that is a pretty shitty way to spend a birthday.
So......
I LOVE YOU MOMMY!
Sunday, April 22, 2012
With a Purpose
So you know that schedule thing that I set up reminders for on my phone? My phone isn't here anymore......
Lemme esplain.
I had break this week. So did one of my best friends (not derp). She's not really the derp dur hurr kinda girl, so I'll use Amy as her code name. Amy came with me on Friday. To a big wooden playground. It was because of my siblings, but regardless. It looked kinda like Hogwarts. So naturally, I had to pick up a twig and wield it as my wand: Pear, unicorn horn core, 14 3/4 inches, surprisingly swishy (from Pottermore XD). We were running around, crawling through the Chamber of Secrets (various tunnels made for 5-12 year olds and not for people like me.... my butt got stuck.), playing Don't Touch the Ground and pretending that the broken climbing web was Devil Snare. So we didn't get ANY weird looks there from the mothers there with their children.
Then we went to the beach. It wasn't particularly warm, so Amy and I decided to go for a walk on the boardwalk. Suffice it to say we couldn't find the boardwalk. We ending up climbing and leaping about on rocks instead.
You know how in movies the main characters often end up running or doing anything with that sense of urgency? That sense that they have to do something, are accomplishing something? Let's call that doing things with a purpose. We felt like that when we were climbing. We had no explanation of what we were doing for onlookers besides climbing rocks.... with a purpose.
Eventually we wound or way back down to the water, where my siblings/their friends were digging "cozy holes" (no explanation) where the River fed into the ocean. The sand kinda drops off pretty deep there. After much derping on my part, we started digging too. The thing about sand is that it's not very stable, especially when it's a steep slope down about 7 feet to the bottom. In retrospect not a very safe place to bring little children to play, but in reality being safe is ever so dull.
Keep in mind, I never had intentions of getting wet. I was wearing capri jeans and a t-shirt, with my phone in my pocket.
Basically, you step on the sand and it swallows you up to your knee where you then slip into the water. I was holding onto the higher, rocky sand when I slid. Well, to be more specific it was my right leg. The side that my phone was in. We had already splashed eachother quite a bit, so I didn't really feel the temperature of the water. What I did feel was my leg floating up, which was quite pleasant. The current was nice and slow, nothing dangerous. My pants were completely damp at that point and covered with sand, so I went completely into the water up to my elbows to rinse off. When I got out and had to hike my pants back up to the appropriate place on my hips, I remembered my phone was in my pocket. So I put it with my shoes and towel, thinking it'd be fine. I've dropped it in the toilet about 3 times already, so I know to take out the battery and let it dry for a couple hours and then it works fine.
Apparently saltwater is different. My dad blasted it with compressed air from his computer technician stuff, and it's been sitting in a bowl of rice for the past 10 hours. **Sigh...** I don't think it's gonna come back and I don't get another upgrade for awhile......
UPDATE- 4/24/12: We found my mother's previous phone in a drawer, and it works pretty well. Takes amahzing pictures! So now I am the proud owner of a pre-owned silver Alias!
Lemme esplain.
I had break this week. So did one of my best friends (not derp). She's not really the derp dur hurr kinda girl, so I'll use Amy as her code name. Amy came with me on Friday. To a big wooden playground. It was because of my siblings, but regardless. It looked kinda like Hogwarts. So naturally, I had to pick up a twig and wield it as my wand: Pear, unicorn horn core, 14 3/4 inches, surprisingly swishy (from Pottermore XD). We were running around, crawling through the Chamber of Secrets (various tunnels made for 5-12 year olds and not for people like me.... my butt got stuck.), playing Don't Touch the Ground and pretending that the broken climbing web was Devil Snare. So we didn't get ANY weird looks there from the mothers there with their children.
Then we went to the beach. It wasn't particularly warm, so Amy and I decided to go for a walk on the boardwalk. Suffice it to say we couldn't find the boardwalk. We ending up climbing and leaping about on rocks instead.
You know how in movies the main characters often end up running or doing anything with that sense of urgency? That sense that they have to do something, are accomplishing something? Let's call that doing things with a purpose. We felt like that when we were climbing. We had no explanation of what we were doing for onlookers besides climbing rocks.... with a purpose.
Eventually we wound or way back down to the water, where my siblings/their friends were digging "cozy holes" (no explanation) where the River fed into the ocean. The sand kinda drops off pretty deep there. After much derping on my part, we started digging too. The thing about sand is that it's not very stable, especially when it's a steep slope down about 7 feet to the bottom. In retrospect not a very safe place to bring little children to play, but in reality being safe is ever so dull.
Keep in mind, I never had intentions of getting wet. I was wearing capri jeans and a t-shirt, with my phone in my pocket.
Basically, you step on the sand and it swallows you up to your knee where you then slip into the water. I was holding onto the higher, rocky sand when I slid. Well, to be more specific it was my right leg. The side that my phone was in. We had already splashed eachother quite a bit, so I didn't really feel the temperature of the water. What I did feel was my leg floating up, which was quite pleasant. The current was nice and slow, nothing dangerous. My pants were completely damp at that point and covered with sand, so I went completely into the water up to my elbows to rinse off. When I got out and had to hike my pants back up to the appropriate place on my hips, I remembered my phone was in my pocket. So I put it with my shoes and towel, thinking it'd be fine. I've dropped it in the toilet about 3 times already, so I know to take out the battery and let it dry for a couple hours and then it works fine.
Apparently saltwater is different. My dad blasted it with compressed air from his computer technician stuff, and it's been sitting in a bowl of rice for the past 10 hours. **Sigh...** I don't think it's gonna come back and I don't get another upgrade for awhile......
UPDATE- 4/24/12: We found my mother's previous phone in a drawer, and it works pretty well. Takes amahzing pictures! So now I am the proud owner of a pre-owned silver Alias!
Friday, April 13, 2012
Houston, We Have Kazoos
Derp and I are in a dance company together. She is one of the dance captains, I am an honorary one because I always help out with that stuff. We celebrate birthdays each month, and this time it was derp's turn. We had gathered enough money and were off to the Target Dollar Stop. We put together good birthday baskets, and I forced derp to put down the extra cotton candy.
When we got in the checkout line, we found derp's mother. We call her Mama C (C=first initial of last name.).
SIDE STORY TO EXPLAIN FOLLOWING EVENTS
Derp and I are derps. We aren't ashamed to say that we love a kids show, The Doodlebops.
Here's a reference pic, so you can fully grasp our level of maturity....
So that is what we spend our time watching.
When they do the Doodlebop pledge, they use kazoos. In fact, all the most hardcore Doodlebop dvd box sets come with special gold kazoos.
Bonus: We have Doodlebop telepathy. We sense when the other is thinking. Even from across distances.
BACK TO THE MAIN STORY
Mama C had found us a 4 pack of kazoos. On the long car ride home, we would usually be screaming and laughing and trolololing.
WE WENT 7 MINUTES STRAIGHT, NO TALKING. JUST KAZOOS.
WHEN WE GOT IN THE HOUSE, WE PLAYED RANDOM SONGS OFF THE TOP OF OUR HEADS.
For 15 MINUTES. It only stopped when derp sat on her armoir and knocked over a glass of water....
It's only 10:30 pm, EST. We don't even go into full on spazz mode until, say, 12:45 am.....
This could be bad.
When we got in the checkout line, we found derp's mother. We call her Mama C (C=first initial of last name.).
SIDE STORY TO EXPLAIN FOLLOWING EVENTS
Derp and I are derps. We aren't ashamed to say that we love a kids show, The Doodlebops.
Here's a reference pic, so you can fully grasp our level of maturity....
When they do the Doodlebop pledge, they use kazoos. In fact, all the most hardcore Doodlebop dvd box sets come with special gold kazoos.
Bonus: We have Doodlebop telepathy. We sense when the other is thinking. Even from across distances.
BACK TO THE MAIN STORY
Mama C had found us a 4 pack of kazoos. On the long car ride home, we would usually be screaming and laughing and trolololing.
WE WENT 7 MINUTES STRAIGHT, NO TALKING. JUST KAZOOS.
WHEN WE GOT IN THE HOUSE, WE PLAYED RANDOM SONGS OFF THE TOP OF OUR HEADS.
For 15 MINUTES. It only stopped when derp sat on her armoir and knocked over a glass of water....
It's only 10:30 pm, EST. We don't even go into full on spazz mode until, say, 12:45 am.....
This could be bad.
It Has Begun
So I promised I would post again. And now I am.
I am at one of my best derp's house, and we have oven pizza a Diet Coke. We are ever so mature, so the drooling and gas and laughing has started. It probably won't subside until about.... noon, tomorrow?
Here's a lil' ditty to keep you entertained.
I am at one of my best derp's house, and we have oven pizza a Diet Coke. We are ever so mature, so the drooling and gas and laughing has started. It probably won't subside until about.... noon, tomorrow?
Here's a lil' ditty to keep you entertained.
We Might Get Molested...
You know that "other derp" I mentioned in the previous post? Like two minutes ago? I'm still posting later, but this popped into my head. So.
She is the reason we are so getting raped one day.
Here's what she came up with:
We like to go downtown, outside our public library. Sit on some rocks that face a busy main road.
And get the attention of complete strangers in their cars by waving and making weird faces. Sometimes they wave back. A lot of cute guys honk.
But the ones with rapist beards just stare at us as they slowly drive by...
Once, a really creepy man pulled over and starting walking towards us. We ran and he followed.
So we ran into the library to wait it out.
Guess where he went?
We ended up hiding in the bathroom of a public library for an hour, eating our Subway sammiches on the floor in the handicap stall. When I went to check and he was still there, she took out her phone and went on youtube.
We almost got kicked out of the public library for squatting in the bathroom, eating, and making excessive noise laughing at cat videos.
She is the reason we are so getting raped one day.
Here's what she came up with:
We like to go downtown, outside our public library. Sit on some rocks that face a busy main road.
And get the attention of complete strangers in their cars by waving and making weird faces. Sometimes they wave back. A lot of cute guys honk.
But the ones with rapist beards just stare at us as they slowly drive by...
Once, a really creepy man pulled over and starting walking towards us. We ran and he followed.
So we ran into the library to wait it out.
Guess where he went?
We ended up hiding in the bathroom of a public library for an hour, eating our Subway sammiches on the floor in the handicap stall. When I went to check and he was still there, she took out her phone and went on youtube.
We almost got kicked out of the public library for squatting in the bathroom, eating, and making excessive noise laughing at cat videos.
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Foods I Might Shank You For
So I haven't posted in a while... Mostly what I've been doing is schoolwork, dance, baby sitting, sitting on my friends, biting them, and trolling around elsewhere on the internet. I am also Catholic. So I celebrate Easter, and I ate a lot of candy.
So I've been doing nothing important and I gained about two pounds in like the past month...
These are the foods I was eating.
WARNING: If I post about 10 million lists in the next week, do not be alarmed. I get Spring break and I don't have anything better to do. Because I have three friends... Yeah. But I feel like you already knew that because blogs are what trolls like me have....
NUMERO UNO:
Cookies.
Chocolate chip. Sugar. Peanut Butter. Oatmeal Raisin.
I will, in fact, use physical violence to obtain these sweet sweet little things.
Basically... STEP AWAY FROM THE COOKIES B*TCH.
Oh, and a warning to all you sneaky turds who think it's a good idea to not label cookies: IF IT IS A FREAKING OATMEAL RAISIN COOKIE, WRITE THAT ON THE PLATE/TRAY/PACKAGE.
I have no problem with oat/rai cookies. I love them. But if they are sitting there innocently on the table and I expect gooey chocolate chips, THAT IS NO GOOD.
NUMBER TWO:
Spray cheese.
I don't care if I'm lactose intolerant and get violently ill when I finish an entire can.
Unicorns poop glitter and rainbows, so I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess that this is Chuck Norris's feces, condensed into a can and made ready for me to spray onto my bacon.
Nuff' said.
NUMERO TRES:
Bacon.
Quoting Matthew Inman of the hysterical site The Oatmeal, bacon is better than love. "True love happens once in a lifetime, bacon can happen 7 times a day if you want it to. Bacon you can keep in the fridge, true love you cannot. Bacon will always be there for you."
NUMBER FOUR:
Pudding.
This might also be made of Chuck Norris's keester cakes.
So I've been doing nothing important and I gained about two pounds in like the past month...
These are the foods I was eating.
WARNING: If I post about 10 million lists in the next week, do not be alarmed. I get Spring break and I don't have anything better to do. Because I have three friends... Yeah. But I feel like you already knew that because blogs are what trolls like me have....
NUMERO UNO:
Cookies.
Chocolate chip. Sugar. Peanut Butter. Oatmeal Raisin.
I will, in fact, use physical violence to obtain these sweet sweet little things.
Basically... STEP AWAY FROM THE COOKIES B*TCH.
Oh, and a warning to all you sneaky turds who think it's a good idea to not label cookies: IF IT IS A FREAKING OATMEAL RAISIN COOKIE, WRITE THAT ON THE PLATE/TRAY/PACKAGE.
I have no problem with oat/rai cookies. I love them. But if they are sitting there innocently on the table and I expect gooey chocolate chips, THAT IS NO GOOD.
NUMBER TWO:
Spray cheese.
I don't care if I'm lactose intolerant and get violently ill when I finish an entire can.
Unicorns poop glitter and rainbows, so I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess that this is Chuck Norris's feces, condensed into a can and made ready for me to spray onto my bacon.
Nuff' said.
NUMERO TRES:
Bacon.
Quoting Matthew Inman of the hysterical site The Oatmeal, bacon is better than love. "True love happens once in a lifetime, bacon can happen 7 times a day if you want it to. Bacon you can keep in the fridge, true love you cannot. Bacon will always be there for you."
NUMBER FOUR:
Pudding.
This might also be made of Chuck Norris's keester cakes.
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
I Don't Live There...
Yesterday when I got to school it was really cold. Being the heatseeking water-bags we are, the entirety of the school went to wait for the first bell in the cafeteria. Because it was around 30˚ Fahrenheit, I think this was pretty reasonable thing.
I get to the door and get shooed away by my health saying, "You'll be fine! IT IS 55˚ DEGREES IN DENVER, COLORADO!"
We don't live there. Your argument is extraneous.
And extremely irrelevant.
I get to the door and get shooed away by my health saying, "You'll be fine! IT IS 55˚ DEGREES IN DENVER, COLORADO!"
We don't live there. Your argument is extraneous.
And extremely irrelevant.
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